changing the countdown

2 days. 2 more days. it's just so unreal. i understand that i'm going home but i just can't even begin to imagine it. this family is now my family. this house is my house. and this place is my home. leaving on tuesday will be one of the hardest things i have ever done.

last night i spent an amazing day/evening with 2 of my best friends - leo and menno. we drank beer and ate delicious food all over amsterdam. we even got the chance to visit and sing and drink in some old amsterdam pubs which was just the best thing ever.

today is now sunday. which means going home is right around the corner. just last week i was counting down the days in my head, but now that it's so close to going home, instead of counting down the days i'm now counting down other things...

- 2 more dinners with the family
- 2 more goodnight kisses from beau
- 1 more day i get to spend time with the girls
- 1 more night with the parents
- 2 more nights in my comfy bed
- 2 more days in europe

it's just getting more and more sad as it gets closer. i find myself thinking about not doing these things and being with these amazing people i've been with for 9 months and it just makes me want to cry. this was my life. this is my life. and in 2 days it will be completely different.

let's just hope i can make it until tuesday without crying. (because i know just as much as anyone else who knows how much of a baby i am, that tuesday i will be crying for sure. it will be a day with no makeup - because i will be a hot mess at the airport)

xoxo